I’m finding I’m having to create my happy again as anxiety and depression have been stealing from me. Bringing light into the darkness has been extra hard this year.

Yes, I’m a Christian and I battle anxiety and depression.

I know there are others and we, the church, need to talk about it more. About the fact that well known theologians and even heroes of the faith in the Bible battled this too. About the fact that it is okay to not be okay sometimes.

I read the Word and listen to worship music and yes, it helps tremendously. I have a counselor and a mentor who have been amazing in helping me uncover and lay down things that were causing me chaos.

But sometimes the world is too loud and I struggle to just “pray it away”. In these times the light isn’t bright enough to chase away the dark.

And so I cry for apparently no reason. And I get angry at the drop of a hat. And I look sad and telling me to smile doesn’t help.

But I’m working on not staying long in those moments. I’m working on how to speak life to myself so the darkness cannot stand. How to take back ground I’ve allowed the enemy to camp out on.

That is why the Word lacks power for me at times. Because I’ve allowed Satan’s lies to speak to my heart where I’m supposed to be hiding the Word.

Ammie’s Heart

I’m learning this is a journey. Bringing light into the darkness is a continual process. Much like any other worthwhile endeavor you have to work at it.

See, just reading the Word doesn’t get it in you fully. You have to really meditate on it and study it. Pray for God to reveal to you what He is saying through scripture.

Having a good Bible commentary is extremely helpful in understanding scripture better.

Journaling has been a great way for me to remember what I’m learning. It is also a great place for me to record the victories when I’m able to bring light into the dark.

Bit by bit you use the weapons of the Word and prayer to push Satan and his ilk back. Often it is in baby steps, but sometimes God shows out and helps you make big gains.

Both the big and little victories should be celebrated!

I’m sure you are familiar with Ephesians 6 and Paul’s admonition to put on the armor of God. Indeed it is the only way! Let’s have a look:

10 “Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might.

11 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.

12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

14 Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;

15 And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;

16 Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.

17 And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:

18 Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;”

This passage is our instruction on how to battle the dark. The power we invoke when we take up the armor is the very power that raised our Lord from the dead!

We need to understand that and take it to heart. Bringing light into the darkness becomes easier the more we practice this concept.

So while the dark may still creep in and prayer in those times seems ineffective…pray anyway. Sing anyway. Worship anyway.

And when it still seems it isn’t working, talk with someone. Get a mentor or counselor or both! Talking about what troubles you is one of the best ways to remove the power from those things and restore your balance.

I say get a counselor or mentor because you need to gather with others who have succeeded at bringing light into the dark.

The Bible tells us to seek wise counsel. Seasoned prayer warriors who can enter the battle with you. Word warriors who know scripture and have been applying it’s power for years.

Do not lose hope or faith. Hold on to Jesus. He will help you bring light into the darkness.

I know because He is helping me.

Ammie Black